Would it still be safe to stay?

Last year was one of our better years.

It's okay to look back and second guess. I see the end of the summer like a starter gun. It was the new beginning. The restart of tomorrow. I feel it's been a long time since her eyes have met with mine and I'm glad she made up her mind. i wish I had something more to give to those brief fleeting memories; A smile, a nod, a good day maybe. A captured moment from when I was younger, the fire never abating as I forged forward into my current place its fuel a mixture of what was and what might be. It would be nice to look back and say that I proved myself right. I would be nice to look back and say that everything that's been done was for a reason; an unsalable truth that led me onward to what's right. That'd be nice to know. Unfortunately all I really have are those lost uncaptured yesterdays as proof to myself that they happened. I wish I had something to convey the senses of my youth. I want for nothing save proof to my children and myself that I lived with everything I had to give. It always seems that I watch people leave my life with the setting of the sun. Their backs turning to face their own futures but with our time a moment of escaped predominance, a safe memory of what was something to build on. I really can't dream anymore since those days have left. I've become stale air in a confined room; not moving and nowhere to go. I don't miss her nearly as much as I miss the smell of her hair on the other side of the bed. I miss her singing me to sleep.

Last year really was one of my better years.